Why I'm still singing Blessed be Your name.

.

.

Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:
By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand,

and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.

Romans 5:1-2

.

.

He is still a loving God...

I can count a million times

People asking me how

I Can praise You

with all that I've gone through

The question just amazes me

Can circumstances possibly

Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed

Long before these rainy days

It's never really ever crossed my mind

To turn my back on you, oh Lord

My only shelter from the storm

But instead I draw closer through these times

So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace

Bring the chance to be free

Bring me anything that brings You glory

And I know there'll be days

When this life brings me pain

But if that's what it takes to praise You

Jesus, bring the rain

I am Yours regardless of

The dark clouds that may loom above

Because You are much greater than my pain

You who made a way for me

By suffering Your destiny

So tell me what's a little rain

So I pray



Holy, holy, holy

Is the Lord God Almighty

Divine intervention

I blogged out a letter to God but chose to delete it.

.

I am not mad with God. I have many questions. I'm broken and searching for answers and comfort from Him.

.

Nonetheless, midway, I deleted it. I am struggling and hurting. I am all for sharing my heart. But I would never want someone who is searching to fall on that one blog and by reading into my struggles instead deduct from it that God does not answer our prayers.

.

I still beleive God does answer prayer. I still can't understand how, why, or when. But I beleive that He hears our cries. I think that He does intervene when we ask Him to..just not always in the way we would have liked.

.

I asked God last night why He didn't hear my prayers, why He didn't make my father's spot disappear, why it had to happen now?

.

I asked God "Why didn't You intervene?"

.

I don't think I have often experienced God 'speaking' to me directly. At least not in this way..
But I am assured this time. So I will go ahead, at the risk of sounding terribly cliche and say it...God spoke to me.

.

God said this.
'How do you know that I didn't intervene?'

.

Yup..that's it. Nothing fancy. No thunderous words. No bright lights. Just one question, one sentence that completly interrupted my train of thought.

That one sentence... says a whole lot..

Your will be done.

After this manner therefore pray ye:

Our Father which art in heaven,

Hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come,

Thy will be done in earth,

as it is in heaven.

Matthew 6:9-10

.

.

Due to crazy circumstances happening in the lives of many around me, I've had alot to pray for lately. It's gotten to the point that I don't know 'what to pray'. The Lord's prayer has been in my head for the last few days.

.

Im processing alot of information and need to blog it out. Maybe once written out, I may be able to see the message more clearly. Not sure but it's worth a try. My head is foggy these days...

.

.

Thy will be done.

God's will and my father possibly finding out that he has cancer. I don't think someone dying of cancer is in God's will. I don't think any sickness is in God's will. I beleive that when we pray to God that His will be done, we pray for healing. When we ask for God's will to be done in our lives, we pray that circumstances change to the way He would have intended them to be in the first place.

.

Praying for His overuling hand to bring a touch of heaven to earth.

.

When asking God for His will to be done over my father's life, I beleive I am asking Him to miraculously make the spot on his lung disappear. I am also asking for so much more. More than I could even comprehend.

In other circumstances, I beleive that God's will isn't shown in miracles, but that to see God's will be done, we must actively live it.

.

My God is loving. He does not want us sick. Does not want us to experience pain. And would love this earth to be as it is in heaven. I believe that is His will.

.

I have a hard time believing that it is in God's will for someone to be ill. I know that many of the 'bad' things that happen in our lives are caused by sin, ours or others, but sin nonetheless.

.

I worried for a second that with my conviction that God is good, that I may be deeply disappointed should worse come to worse... but I am also understanding that choices we make lead to consequences in our lives.

Im still processing why God doesn't intervene in all situations, why people die when we ask for miracles.. I don't think Ill get the answer. My comfort is that God is still good, and there are things I just won't be able to understand in this lifetime.

.

So I will keep believing with conviction, that God is loving, that His heart breaks when we suffer, that He is sovereign and that He can do miracles. I will keep believing that He can at times show us glimpses of heaven.

I will keep praying that His will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.

Same tree.

As I was walking home, I saw a man standing alone in a bus shelter. By the looks of him, he looked like any other average Joe. What was amazing was that from across this busy street, I also heard the man. Belting out, singing "Father, there is no name like your name." His voice was beautiful! He poured out his heart onto this busy boulevard with no reservations.
To many this man must have looked completly insane..sigh..a 'Jesus Freak'. But to me, for those few moments as I walked by and gave him the biggest smile, I felt connected.

Hmmm...

I'm a little overwhelmed these days. Processing alot. Feeling a weight on my shoulders that I can't shake. Tired of the stresses of everyday life and battling, seriously battling, to keep my head above water. Keeping my mind and heart focused on the beautiful blessings this life has to offer.

It's been a tough two weeks. My grandpa passed away last week and am not sure how or if it has all processed. Maybe because I feel like life just went on..when I would have liked the world to stop turning for just a moment.

Work is my biggest stress right now..and I hate that. It is mostly the stresses of others that are impacting me. I can feel it.

I am praying for a sense of peace, for rest. Praying to keep my eyes on Jesus and to know that this will pass and that He is always with me.

I'm tired... just so so tired..

Little brother...

Beautiful blessings

-What a beautiful thing it is to have your heart break for something. To feel the burden of another's struggle. To want nothing more than to share the love of Christ and to trust that He can do the impossible.

-What a blessing it is to find meaning and purpose in this life. And to trust that I will never be acting alone, that I will always have Jesus guiding me.

-How amazing it is to know the meaning of true love. To feel unconditional love and to learn to give it back.

-How wonderful it is to let your guard down, without fear of being attacked or criticized. How wonderful it is to finally just be..me.

-How great is it to live with conviction, with belief, with faith.

-How beautiful is it to see the eyes of another's heart slowly open to the truth.

-What a blessing it is to see others deepening their relationship with God, following God, trusting God.


Beautiful..beautiful blessings.

May God bless you and may your heart overflow with His love. I pray that you see, feel, breathe, live the blessings He has placed in your life.
Amen. AMEN!

Greater things have yet to come.

When we hear one another..

I have been on this journey with 24/7 for about a month now.

Looking back, in God's perfect timing, I have been on this journey for much longer than that.

From the time I was saved a little over a year ago, I kept a journal. A few journal entries into my first journal, I stopped journalling and instead filled the blank pages with conversations with God. Pages and pages and pages...of prayer.

Reading back to this years journal, taking into account my new passion for prayer and my strong belief in the mission of 24/7, I see that God has been preparing me for this very moment.


Again, here are bits and pieces of my journal..

April 13/14th
Lord, where is it that you are leading me? Where is it? What is it you want from me? What are you asking? Lord, guide me. Teach me. Help me.

I have felt a strong stirring lately. I pray Lord that you bring things to light and make them clear.

I then refer to my blog where I wrote :

-Prayer. What is prayer? Why does God want us to pray? What do our prayers accomplish? God is not an order taker.. how can we make our prayers 'effective'. What does prayer bring to me? and how does God change my heart through prayer? How does He use my prayers?

-My future.. Where is God leading me? In my life, the relationships he has set on my path, the pressings I feel on my heart, the feeling of unrest, his involvement in my career and day to day. There are certain places I know God has placed me in and there I will stay. I just feel a pressing on my heart that another route will be coming along.. I am in waiting..


From then on, it seemed as thought I was on a quest for prayer. I read books on prayer that had up to that moment been left on the shelf, I called people for their thoughts on prayer, I read any scripture that pertained to prayer.. searching... for ...something...


April 25th
I search for You Jesus & yearn to pray without ceasing. Glorifying You. Praising You. Trusting You. Following You. I ask Lord that Your Spirit come alive in me. Guide me, speak through me.

May 1st
Thank you for surrounding me with lessons of prayer. You have engulfed me in prayer. Teach me to pray Jesus. Perfect me in prayer Lord. Teach me to pray without ceasing. Teach me to pray efficiently for others. To pray in a manner that is pleasing to You. Please God, show me how to pray and let your Spirit guide me in my prayers. Pray through me.


May 8th
Lord, this hunger I have for prayer and the feeling of some things to come have been placed on my heart for some time now. I thank you for it. I thank you for calling my attention to it.

I will continue learning, reading, searching as you prepare me for things to come. Help me be patient Jesus.

On my birthday, Daria (whom I met at community prayer in March) gave me Red Moon Rising- How 24/7 prayer is awakening a generation.. I did not read it until a month ago.. (I read it in a week!!! And will no doubt read it again!)

Through my journal, throughout the summer, even through the valleys, I continued in prayer.


Then in October, Westside did an entire series on prayer.. and I knew.. I knew.. something was happening. I stretched out of my comfort zone and tried different ways to speak and hear God as often as I could..
Praying out loud. Praying over people. Setting up a prayer wall in my room. Praying in pictures. Writing prayers in my phone message book at work before I begin my day..

I practiced what God had been teaching me..

Then in a funny turn of events, Daria (24/7 leader) and I grew closer and I became (as she puts it) her Barnabas haha.. The past few month has been such an adventure!! God is doing amazing things and we are so blessed to catch a glimpse of it!

And here we are.. two days before our 24/7 Canada Vision night held here in Montreal.


Proof to me..

God hears our prayers.