Greater things have yet to come.

When we hear one another..

I have been on this journey with 24/7 for about a month now.

Looking back, in God's perfect timing, I have been on this journey for much longer than that.

From the time I was saved a little over a year ago, I kept a journal. A few journal entries into my first journal, I stopped journalling and instead filled the blank pages with conversations with God. Pages and pages and pages...of prayer.

Reading back to this years journal, taking into account my new passion for prayer and my strong belief in the mission of 24/7, I see that God has been preparing me for this very moment.


Again, here are bits and pieces of my journal..

April 13/14th
Lord, where is it that you are leading me? Where is it? What is it you want from me? What are you asking? Lord, guide me. Teach me. Help me.

I have felt a strong stirring lately. I pray Lord that you bring things to light and make them clear.

I then refer to my blog where I wrote :

-Prayer. What is prayer? Why does God want us to pray? What do our prayers accomplish? God is not an order taker.. how can we make our prayers 'effective'. What does prayer bring to me? and how does God change my heart through prayer? How does He use my prayers?

-My future.. Where is God leading me? In my life, the relationships he has set on my path, the pressings I feel on my heart, the feeling of unrest, his involvement in my career and day to day. There are certain places I know God has placed me in and there I will stay. I just feel a pressing on my heart that another route will be coming along.. I am in waiting..


From then on, it seemed as thought I was on a quest for prayer. I read books on prayer that had up to that moment been left on the shelf, I called people for their thoughts on prayer, I read any scripture that pertained to prayer.. searching... for ...something...


April 25th
I search for You Jesus & yearn to pray without ceasing. Glorifying You. Praising You. Trusting You. Following You. I ask Lord that Your Spirit come alive in me. Guide me, speak through me.

May 1st
Thank you for surrounding me with lessons of prayer. You have engulfed me in prayer. Teach me to pray Jesus. Perfect me in prayer Lord. Teach me to pray without ceasing. Teach me to pray efficiently for others. To pray in a manner that is pleasing to You. Please God, show me how to pray and let your Spirit guide me in my prayers. Pray through me.


May 8th
Lord, this hunger I have for prayer and the feeling of some things to come have been placed on my heart for some time now. I thank you for it. I thank you for calling my attention to it.

I will continue learning, reading, searching as you prepare me for things to come. Help me be patient Jesus.

On my birthday, Daria (whom I met at community prayer in March) gave me Red Moon Rising- How 24/7 prayer is awakening a generation.. I did not read it until a month ago.. (I read it in a week!!! And will no doubt read it again!)

Through my journal, throughout the summer, even through the valleys, I continued in prayer.


Then in October, Westside did an entire series on prayer.. and I knew.. I knew.. something was happening. I stretched out of my comfort zone and tried different ways to speak and hear God as often as I could..
Praying out loud. Praying over people. Setting up a prayer wall in my room. Praying in pictures. Writing prayers in my phone message book at work before I begin my day..

I practiced what God had been teaching me..

Then in a funny turn of events, Daria (24/7 leader) and I grew closer and I became (as she puts it) her Barnabas haha.. The past few month has been such an adventure!! God is doing amazing things and we are so blessed to catch a glimpse of it!

And here we are.. two days before our 24/7 Canada Vision night held here in Montreal.


Proof to me..

God hears our prayers.

24 hour prayer

Westside's first 24 hour prayer has come to an end.

WOW!!!!!!!!

After 48 hours without sleep, I should really be in bed right now..but need to capture my emotions beforehand.

First off let me explain,
A group of us from church (Westside Gathering in conjuction with 24/7 Prayer Canada) prayed for 24 hours for our community, the world, our loved ones, friends, neighbours and basically anyone who requested prayer.


The responses I received in request for prayers were a blessing but also a great responsibility. I told these people that we would pray for them.. and I have to admit, as they kept pouring in.. I felt some anxiety. That anxiety was quickly dissolved once I came to the realization that God had already heard their cries, that He would carry their burdens..not me.

So... we parked our Uhaul converted into a prayer room at the Esso Gas Station at the corner of St-John's boulevard and began pumping out prayer..
I understand that a Uhaul is a bit unconvetional, just as is 24hours of continuous prayer.. but I follow a God that parted waters, made donkeys speak and walked on water.. therefore our crazy, 'radical' Uhaul surely made Him smile. :)

This has been an experience of a lifetime.

In only 24hours, I have been blessed, challenged, stretched, inspired.

My most enjoyable moments were spent silently watching Westside pray. I would open my eyes as we prayed and look around at these big hearts yearning for restoration in our city.
It brought tears to my eyes. I was witnessing God at work. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.

I was also touched by the true desire of my community to share the love of Christ with others. Touched by the discomfort/pain we all experience, knowing that others don't know, cannot understand, how Jesus truly transforms lives and brings an inexplainable fullness to one's life. I was happy to see this authentic desire to share it with everyone who crosses our path.

The prayers were bittersweet.
It was a blessing feel God's heart for people.
It was a great joy to join Him in prayer.
Nonetheless, it broke my heart to hear the cries of my community.

We were in the presence of the Lord..
.... wow!.....

Nonetheless.. my prayers will not end here. Every prayer posted on those walls must be transcribed to our hearts. I know God is pleased that we spent this time with Him, that we prayed that His will be done.. nonethess, if we wish to remain with Him on this great adventure He has planned.. the praying must go on!
The prayers I prayed broke my heart, and I pray that it continues bleeding.

Greater things...
have yet to come...
in this city.

May God bless you.

The 13th hour

Posting from my journal...

Nov 8th. 8 am. 2008
Still no sleep.

13 hours in the spiritual world.
Praying alone, praying others requests, anonymously, in the dark hours of the night.

Now watching traffic go by..
Watching people rushing to work..
throwing prayers upon them as they speed by.

Waiting with excitement to see the room again.
To see Your work on the walls.

Did they feel our prayers as we whispered in the night, as they slept unaware?
Has one person woken up feeling closer to You Lord?
Has healing touched someone in the wee hours of the night?

I beleive God that You have done great things tonight.
I beleive that You have heard our prayers, searched the depths of our hearts for Your desires.
I beleive that You have been among us.

I thank You God for somehow keeping me awake when I would rather sleep.
I thank You for allowing me to experience every moment, for allowing me to keep watch, & to greet each new arrival.

In the past 13 hours... I have been overwhelmed with... joy.

Prayer.

Love that Westside is walking through a series about prayer.
I also know that we are in tune with God's leading because I see so many people on fire about prayer lately.

It's amazing.

Follow me.- Today

First of all.. To my God.
Lord forgive me.

And to you... I am so sorry.

"Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow." - James 4:14

I learnt this the hard way tonight. I truly believe that this is the first time that I am fully aware that I missed out on a blessing. That Jesus cried out "Follow me" and I replied .. "tuesday".

It is not that I did not have it on my heart to do what the Lord called me to do. I was just ... busy. Imagine that.. don't I feel sheepish now? Actually, I feel much worse.

Lord, I pray, that the next time you place something on my heart.. I drop everything to follow you.

If you believe that God is calling you to do something. Do it now. Follow. Do not tarry. Nothing is more important and all other things (which in hindsight are simply details) can wait.

"Act decidedly and take the consequences. No good deed was ever done by hesitation."

Thomas Henry Huxley

"Nonna" .. Rispoci in Pace. I know you are with the Lord. I will continue joining you in your prayers for your loved ones. Without ever meeting you have touched my heart. Thank you.

Crisis.

Ironic that I am not worried about the state of the markets these days. I have been trained to tell you that it is because I believe in the historical trends of the markets, that we have been in worse situations before, that you must think long term. As a financial advisor, I could show you graph upon graph to prove these facts to you. All of this is true.
But here is a place where I share my heart. Where I lay down all personalities I portray in my day to day, and stand with nothing but my core. The reason I don't worry about the state of the markets is because I believe there are more important things in this world. I have put much thought into this.. what if I lost all my savings? what if I lost my house? What if I lost my job? What...would I do? I would still be able to find work, still be able to find shelter and still be able to eat. And I would still have God.
We live in a society where jobs are abundant. We live in a society where we can go to the dollar store and buy a can of soup.
Every thing I have is a blessing.
I was told this week, that after the hurricanes in Cuba, food.. basic food such as eggs and bread have become scarce. No matter how many pesos they may have in their pockets, there is no food to buy! This news really put things into perspective for me. As we sit here dreaming about retiring in Riviera Maya instead of Riviere du Loup & trying to stretch our savings to last us 30 years... there are people in this world left starving who are trying to stretch their ration of bread to last them a week.

Anniversaries.

Someone told me this week that I am the girl of anniversaries. It's true.. certain dates remain very important to me. The 16th is one.. I met Jesus on the 16th of June 2007. I was baptised one year ago, on the 16th of September.

I do hold on to anniversaries.. they are a way for me to pause.. to stop planning the future, to stop living in the moment and to simply pause and look back, remember, the wonderful things Christ has done.
My life today, is beyond anything I could of ever imagined. This past year has been nothing but a blessing. Looking back, through trials, tribulations, successes and failures.. Jesus has been right by my side. He has been present in every single aspect, every facet of my day to day life. He has kept His promises, not one has He broken.

I have grown in my faith. I have learnt so much about myself, about others, about Him. I have learnt to listen to the Spirit within me. I know His voice.

I am still so deeply in love with my Jesus. Beyond all He has done for me.. it is His love that keeps me. True pure love.

So on this anniversary, Lord I thank you. I thank you for the past year and thank you for today.

Leadership

Do you have any words that you just can't stand?
The words 'leadership' and 'leader' are two words that when I hear send shivers down my spine like nails on a chalkboard or aluminium gritting my teeth.. (yup that bad..)

Here is my gripe with these words.. they feel puffed up... prideful.
I am slowly working through this and apologize if I offend anyone.. it is an issue of mine that I am working to resolve.
I am slowly coming to realize that I have to let go of my association of the word 'leader' with other words such as command, authority, control, captaincy, rule (all found on online thesaurus) and have to get the negative connotation of the word out of my mind.

It's funny because the word has come up often in the past few days.. many people telling me I may just be a leader.. would be a great 'manager' ... and I just don't see it.. (or just don't want the title?)
If I were to be a leader.. I would want to be amongst my people. Down in the dirt with them, sleeves rolled high. A servant leader? I beleive a true leader is one who wants his people to be leaders. Hmmm.... an Encourager. (is that a word?) I would want no power.. would simply want to empower others. I feel great joy when someone I believe in begins to believe in themselves. (And maybe that is the great joy these 'leaders' feel also..hmmm...)

Again, I apologize.. my thoughts are simply processing here..

When God hears your prayers.

Bits and pieces from my journal...
August 5
Lord, I long for connection. Does this walk have to be a lonely one? Can I not connect with others? Forgive me Jesus if my thoughts are misplaced. I am simply searching for what it is I have been trying to fill. What is it that is so lacking that I would resort to old ways..

I long for a group of people I can simply 'be' with. I ask Lord that you guide me through this time and stay with me Jesus.

I pray about these feelings I have about my community. I long for friendships with my brothers and sisters in Christ. I wish we could enjoy our company outside of Sundays. I pray for true and deep relationships.

It was lacking & I resorted to finding it in the world. Forgive me Jesus.

I pray for Westside. For true friendships. For a weekly, daily community. Not just Sundays. Help me take the steps to reach out. Help me try Lord. And if all else fails.. I will trust in you Lord.



My Daily Devotional email sent to me this morning...
August 10
BIBLE MEDITATION:
“For where two or three are gathered together in My name, there am I in the midst of them.” Matthew 18:20

DEVOTIONAL THOUGHT:There is something wonderful about unity. I heard about a fellow who courted a girl by writing her a beautiful love letter every day for two years. He thought that would be a wonderful way to court her. Do you know what happened? She married the mail carrier! There is nothing like being there. There is nothing like personal contact. There is a sense in which Jesus Christ is present when His people gather that’s not in any other sense. You cannot get it the same way at home.

ACTION POINT:Do you have a church home? If not, I encourage you to find one today. If church attendance isn’t important, I wonder why Satan works so hard to keep folks away. If you do have a church home, make a special effort this week to meet a new friend and find a need they have which you can meet

Today's Sunday Gathering..
Focusing on community, church...

Acts 2 42-47
And they continued stedfastly in the apostles' doctrine and fellowship, and in breaking of bread, and in prayers.
And fear came upon every soul: and many wonders and signs were done by the apostles.
And all that believed were together, and had all things common;
And sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need.
And they, continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart,
Praising God, and having favour with all the people. And the Lord added to the church daily such as should be saved.

My confession.
I need my community. I need a tight circle because I cannot fight alone. I attempted to find these relationships in the world and it led me to sin. The world is very enticing. I describe it as.. a steak which tastes like heaven..better than heaven.. but never fills you. You are hungry..starving.. so you keep, day after day, eating that one steak..which looks so good and tastes so sweet..but which never fills you.
It broke my heart and tore at my spirit. It led me to believe lies. I am not strong enough to fight alone. I feel like I'm drowing...and it breaks my heart.
Forgive me for not trying harder. Forgive me for the bitterness in my heart. Forgive me for beleiving lies.

Lord.. after all I have done, I cannot even begin to comprehend how you would hear my prayers. I thank you for meeting me in the dirtiest, darkest places. Thank you for showing me how much I mean to you..And for loving me when I feel like I am undeserving of even singing your name. Jesus.. I know you are with me. Fighting by my side when I am about to give up. The deepest desire of my heart Lord is to always be in your presence and to please you Lord. Forgive me for not living it out. Forgive me for being too weak to fight at times. Forgive me for doubting that you will fight for me.

Thank you Jesus. Thank you.